World Domination Begins Backstage
by TabbyOfTheSun
Summary: Bray Wyatt meets several wrestlers backstage and tries to convince them he's their rightful leader. They don't exactly agree. Several wrestlers make appearances in this tongue-in-cheek one shot. I do not own any of these people. This is a work of fiction, and is my attempt to amuse myself and others. This fic is clearly not to be taken seriously. Enjoy!


"Rock! You are lost," Bray Wyatt said by way of greeting as The Rock passed him backstage.

"No, I'm good, actually," Rock replied.

"You are- a false idol, Rock! A tragic excuse for a savior to these people, but I!- I am the Eater of Worlds!"

"You've eaten several, from the looks of you… And the Rock thinks you ate a few funny mushrooms, too, if you smeeeellllll what the Rock is cooking!"

"I think you misunderstand me, Rock. You see, I've got the whole world in my hands!"

Rock stared at the singing man for a moment before saying, "The Rock sees that your Candy Ass is crazy."

"I have been called many things, Rock. I am a leader. I am a God! I think-"

"It doesn't matter what you think!"

"Fella!" Sheamus interrupted with a grin as he and the Miz appeared. Miz nodded by way of greeting.

Rock smiled and patted Sheamus on the back. "Good to see you guys," he said.

"Sheamus! Join me! For I am the Eater of Worlds-" Bray said.

"Feed – Me – More!" Ryback shouted as he hurried past them.

"Actually, Fella, I think that fella just beat you to the last world," Sheamus replied. "Can I interest ya in a large asteroid instead?"

"Hell yeah, it's my drinking buddy!" Stone Cold shouted as he and Ron Simmons joined them backstage. He handed Sheamus a couple of beers.

"Gentlemen!" Bray began. "You've come to witness me taking over the world."

"I thought you eat them," Sheamus said. "Which one is it, Fella?"

"What?" Stone Cold asked.

"He's the Eater of Worlds, apparently," Sheamus explained.

"What?" Stone Cold asked again.

"Follow the Buzzards!" Bray proclaimed.

Rock looked from Bray to Stone Cold before he and Stone Cold asked in unison, "What?"

"False idols will fall!" Bray informed them.

"Did your candy ass just call –The Rock- a false idol? Again?" Rock demanded.

"What?" Stone Cold asked. "I don't know what your scripture says, but Austin 3:16 says I'm about to open up a can of whoop-ass!"

"Fella!" Sheamus proclaimed as a familiar figure entered.

"Woooo!" Ric Flair shouted.

"Gonna call him a false idol, too?" Stone Cold asked Bray.

"Only I am the Eater of Worlds!" Bray proclaimed.

Ric raised an eyebrow. "Is that a challenge?" He asked.

"You are all unworthy!" Bray shouted.

Miz looked horrified. "But… I'm the Miz!" He protested. "And I'm… Awesome!"

"Of course ye are, Fella," Sheamus said, patting him on the back indulgently.

"You are nothing!" Bray informed Miz.

"I'll have you know that I'm awesome. Because I'm the Miz. And I'm awesome. Really. Ask Maryse. She thinks so. I swear. Really. She married me. Because I'm awesome. I'm awesome, aren't I, guys?"

Stone Cold raised an eyebrow. "You need this, boy," he said, tossing two cans of beer at Miz.

Miz downed the beer quickly and began muttering to himself, "It's okay. You're awesome. You're definitely awesome."

"You see? False idols are all around us!" Bray said. "You are the biggest fake of them all, Austin!"

"What?" Stone Cold demanded. He flipped Bray off before executing a Stunner.

"Woooo!" Ric shouted in approval.

"Nice one, Fella," Sheamus said.

Bray began singing to himself, "I've got the joy-joy-joy-joy-" then let out a yelp of pain as Hornswoggle ran into the backstage area, kicked him in the shin, and ran off with a grunt.

As Bray whimpered in pain, he realized others had arrived. He looked up and saw two familiar faces looking back at him. Neither wore an animal mask. His minions had failed to rescue him. Instead, one wore a ridiculously bright smile and the other was bouncing off the walls.

"Don't be a lemon, Bray," Adam Rose said cheerfully. "Be a Rosebud!"

He walked away, leaving Bray looking at the last person he wanted to see. "It's okay, Bray," Bo Dallas said. "Remember, just Bo-lieve, and everything will be fine."

"Never," Bray mumbled.

"Fine! No cookies for you then!" Bo kicked him in the head before angrily stomping away.

Bray clutched his head before struggling to stand back up. He finally rose to his feet and proclaimed, "I am the only God amongst mortals."

A gong sounded. The air suddenly froze and the lights went out. Moments later, they came back on and The Undertaker stood behind Bray. He grabbed him and tombstoned him. Bray lay motionless.

"Rest… In… Peeeeace…" The Undertaker said before vanishing in flames.

"Yes! Yes! Yes!" Daniel Bryan shouted as he ran by, arms in the air.

Ron Simmons shook his head, proclaimed, "Damn!" and left.

Looking at the Miz, the Rock, Ric Flair, and Stone Cold, Sheamus shrugged. Stepping over Bray, he said, "Drinks are on me, Fellas!" With that, he led his friends away.


End file.
